A second chance
by Athanors
Summary: Jack Shepard ( my created ME character) took control of the Reapers, always regretting one thing he did. Then something happens, something that changes everything. You will have to read it to find out what I mean by this. btw, I named Kaidan in my story Raphael Kai Alenko. If you don't like it, don't read it... xD
1. Chapter 1

Chapter one

Jack wake up to some unidentified noises. His head were throbbing as his hand reached up to his head. He barely touched it. It felt odd. His face felt odd and it hurt to the touch. What's going on? He thought. His head felt like being wrapped up in bondage. He ripped them off of his head. Jack tried to rose then. But he somehow couldn't. Something heavily laid there... upon him? Jack eyes fluttered open in confusion. He blinked serial times. His eyes adjust to the light in the room after some minutes passed.

Jack looked around as much as his head allowed him to turn around. He was in a medical room, he could tell that much. The unidentified noises were the beeping sound coming from the heart beat checking machine. His eyes moved away from the machine and fell upon his chest. Jack was greeted by some kind of black hair? His chest felt heavily of the extra weight and he couldn't properly breath. Who was it. Jack serious wondered for one moment. Until it all hit him. Memories flicked through his mind. He talked to the crucible, that appeared to be a small kid. He had to make a choice and he did. Jack took control over the reapers. He died in the process of taking over. His body vanished... his mind had stayed... some of his mind stayed behind. Always thinking about one person. He had regretted the choice he did.

Letting Kai talk him into save Ash instead of him. That day he died inside a little or completely. Jack could not tell for sure. Ever since then he treated Ash like shit, which made her hate him. He knew, it wasn't her fault. But he somehow couldn't stop himself from blaming her instead of blaming Kai which talked him into saving her. He hated himself for it. And it pretty much was shown in his reckless actions many weeks after Kai's dead, but also in the way he talked to his companions.. to his closer friends like Garrus and Wrex.. was he halfway friendly. To the others less friendly in all. Thought there were more people he considered as friends. By the time the collectors attacked the human colonies he made some new and old friendships.. Grunt, Zaeed, Garrus rejoined him and some others.. He couldn't forgive himself. No matter what. Guilt ate at him after the encounter with Ash. She was mad at him and Jack let her. He grumpy went back to his ship.. carrying on the mission after he died for the first time.

After Kai died. He realized.. admitted to himself. That he was already in love with the man. But it was to late, Jack couldn't tell the one he loved, that he loved him, because dead pulled Kai away and Jack stayed behind.

After what happened with the crucible, wasn't he the one anymore which he was before. He had changed.. He felt cold, cold like a machine. After the know got passed on went all reapers away and eventually shut down. Then something happened, he didn't know what. But Jack found himself back to the time before he had to make a terrible choice.. Virmire.. He was on Virmire... His body trembled and Jack moaned slightly when he pushed away the heavily thing upon him. Much to his shock it was Kai that laid there. Kai... Kai.. his eyes suddenly became watery.

His mouth dry and he tried to swallow the lump which had formed inside his throat to speak. Jack croaked out. "Raphael?" The man Jack had pushed off of his chest was Kai. All the more felt Jack confused. What's going on. Kai was dead. He had left him to die on that Planet. Panic rose inside of his body. Was he dreaming? He pushed himself up a little and got hold of the Male's shoulders. He shook him.. almost violently. Kai awoke by the sudden shaking. He rubbed his eyes, yawning also. His amber brown eyes looked at Jack's blue ones.

Jack on the other hand let go of the Man. His eyes wide open from terror and shock. He was shocked because Kai is well and sat there, by him. Unbelievable. He must be dreaming. Kai watched for a moment the stranger. He was there to make sure the Man which saved his life is doing okay. John Shepard gave him free.. shore leave. "It's good to see you awake. My name is Raphael Kai Alenko. I'm here because..." He coughed awkward and embarrassed? Jack couldn't tell which one... maybe both emotions showed upon Kai's face. "I wanted to thank you for saving my life. I still haven't figured out how or why you did it. But... I am really grateful that you did." He said and smiled.

Jack didn't know what to say or do. He just sat there, stunned. His mind needed time to process what Kai said. After minutes of complete silence.. spoke Jack. "Uhm... I am glad you are alive. I missed you." He blurred out with a sadness he was sure Kai has never heard before. God, he was pathetic. Jack grabbed the hem of Kai's shirt and pulled him close to his chest. He hugged him tightly. And continually repeat the same words over and over. "I am so glad, you are alive..." He whispered, not notice the puzzled look Raphael gave him.

Within seconds moved Raphael away from Jack, he had struggled to get free. "Excuse me. I don't think we have meet before. I don't know you.." Kai stuttered embarrassed. What was the Man thinking. Telling him to have missed him and on the top of that he hugged him? What's wrong with this guy. Kai moved away from the bed, he decided to put a save distance between them. Seemingly thinking the guy has lost his mind.

Jack looked confused at Kai. His mouth opened as when he wanted to say something but no words came over his lips, so Jack closed his mouth and looked at Kai, disbelieving his words. Jack was sure that Kai returned his feelings... there was no doubt about it. Both always had flirted with each other, here and there exchanged small touches. What was going on? He did not understand Kai's reactions. Had he found someone else? Was this why he... Jack groaned out suddenly holding his head in both of his hands. His biotic decided to act up.. firing up. His body appears to be surrounded by blue light and his body trembled as he grunted in pain. The machines that watch his heart rhythm beeped in alarm.

Jack suddenly had a flashback of something he had forgotten. The day of his second birth. He became aware of everything, it felt like hell at the beginning but in fact it took mere seconds for him to adjust as the universe opened up to him for the first time. Where once had been darkness, now there was light, billions worth of knowledge, an endless font. He could see with a thousand eyes, he can be everywhere at once.. like it did matter... but he couldn't forget about him! Being a machine couldn't bring him back. He couldn't touch him since the day he made this damn choice. It hurt him immensely. He felt like dying once again, in fact over and over... it's like a endless dream. The logical part of his well being, kept telling the machine to move on, that he wouldn't want him like this anyway.. even if he could bring him back, the controller of something so hated.. yet. He couldn't help the longing for this man.

But how could he change that? He had been his life.. all he'd know, he was all that he'd fought for even when he wasn't there anymore. He still fought for a better future, and if he would have been still alive he would have also fought for a better future. The illogical part of him, the part currently winning in the moment of awareness, screamed for him unheard, his screams echoed out across the stars, the collective scream of a thousand bodies. He screamed whilst rebuilding the relays, for months and still on going. He cried for him.

Whilst the population of the universe began to accept them. Allowed, in the first few months after the Reapers got shot down, they stood idly, as their numbers dwindled. It hurt.. but eventually, he got used to the dull throbbing in his well being, this aching that made him not forget about him. It quashed any hope of seeing him again, any hope of hearing his laugh, seeing his smile.. his amber coloured eyes. The way they used to work, touch. It was all long gone in the split of one second. He grew cold at some point, just like the machines, he came to control.. the silent cries eventually stopped, and the universe became quieter... all together became a silent machine, working with well oiled coordination, and once they finished repairing all that what was lost, they left. Moved to an empty star system. Accepted the silent rest, they shut down, and waited for the end. Then his flashback became somehow messy and Jack found himself on Virmire.. his body tensed, the blue waves of his biotic's increased.

Kai froze on his spot. He had no idea that the man was a biotic.. just like him. His memory from Virmire was in a mess. He only remembered that someone in a blue-black N7 gear grabbed him and hurried with him over to the waiting Normandy. Then everything went black. Much later... found he out that he was saved by this guy, the Commander told him in a quick briefing. Commander Shepard had chosen Ashley. Just like he had suggest. He knew that Commander Shepard... John Shepard had feelings for Ash. So that left him to dead. He was ready to die. But somehow this guy, in front of him.. managed to save him..

Nurses and Doctors came running into the room. One of the doctors screamed that Kai shall leave the room. What he also did. The doctor struck inside Jack's arm a syringe.. with some sedative. In all, the doctor had to give him two more... before Jack's body calmed down and he fell into a deep sleep. Kai stood outside the room, he walked around, unable to stay still. Eventually, the door to the room slide open and the Nurses along the doctors left the room. "Tie him to the bed. He needs to stay put." The doctor said to her assistant before she marched over to Kai. "Mr. Alenko. What happened inside there? What were you saying to him that made him fire up his biotic's. No, forget it. I don't want to know. Just.. don't upset him again. Geez, If he doesn't stays calm.. his biotic's will kill him. He is not allowed to use them yet, you understand right. He needs rest, his body is weak.. over stressed. I want you to go now. He won't be wake up till tomorrow.." The doctor said gesturing with a jerk of her head that Kai should follow her over to the elevators.

Once there the Doctor spoke again. "We still don't know, who he is. But his body is built like he is in the Alliance or some other sort of army. And he has L3 implants inside his head, the newest implant in fact. It's strange... that he has it. Because it's not even out yet for one week, and also his implant looks like it's been in his head for some years. So we guess he is a soldier. That would also explain why his body is so over stressed. He must have faced a huge amount of stress.. recently or over many years. He hasn't spoken to anyone since his arrival three days ago." The elevator opened it's doors and both stepped inside. The doctor still talked to Kai which was quiet as he did listened.

"I would want you to visit him again.. tomorrow. Maybe he will tell you something about himself. But I am not sure if this will upset him again. You need to avoid this. Understand? I will report to Admiral Hackett, what happened today. And you could inform your Commander. Tell him you are needed here for a while longer.." The doctor said thoughtful. "I understand, doctor." Kai said immediately. Hackett was the one which convinced him to go visit the guy. He was after all there to save him and only him.. which was odd. He said that to Shepard.. before he passed out due to over stress his biotic's.

Shepard also said, he does not know this guy. His armor is familiar to the one he is wearing. What also odd is. Shepard had asked Hackett whether he did send him. But he didn't. He isn't even registered as a N7. That alone put Shepard and his crew on edge. Who was he, why is he here. So many questions but none of them are answered yet. Only the guy inside the medical room can answer them all.. Kai thought, hoped he would.. Kai rubbed tired over his face, as he let out a long sigh. Damn. Why is this happening now? He should be out there fighting against Saren.

Kai went down with the elevator. The doctor got out of it at some point leaving Kai to himself. He still was shaken up from what had happen just minutes ago. His Omni-tool flickered to life. It was Ash. "Hi Ash." Kai said with a smile upon his face. "Is by any chance... the commander around?" He asked her, and she said yes. Kai informed him about the things which had happened. He also asked to stay a few more days there. 'Cause of that what the doctor did told him. Kai felt more at ease after having talked to the Commander and Ash. Both have become his friends, Ash sooner than Shepard, but eventually he became friends with him too. It was then that he notice. Ash and Shepard had became much closer as he did thought before. He was happy for them both. Even thought it was against the Alliance rules.. to form a relationship with a crew member.

It didn't mattered to him. Both seemed happy about being together and he was happy for both of them. Kai ended the call while laughing. Ash joked about the way Shepard danced which of course embarrassed the Commander. He grabbed Ash and ruffled through her hair, his face were flushed with embarrassment. Kai really could not help it, but burst out into a loud laughter. He enjoyed it. But soon after the call ended and Kai made his way towards his prepared apartment. Kai thought about the guy, recalling the moment he was embraced by him. The way he spoke, so strange his words may have sounded... Kai had a feeling the guy was telling the truth. Kai sighed again, and went away to catch some sleep. He felt a little excited about seeing the guy again tomorrow.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter two

The next morning went Kai through his usual routine. Waking up, brush his teeth and take a piss and a shower afterwards. He dressed in his casual clothes. Then he made for himself some coffee, with a dash of cream and three spoons of sugar. He blew on the hot coffee smiling to himself. He kind of felt happy just from that. Mostly because this coffee tastes better as the coffee they get served on board of the Normandy. Then Kai fixed for himself some breakfast. Just some sandwiches, he made a few extra and thought about.. the guy in the hospital might want to eat something else instead of the hospital meals. Which does taste like nothing.. He grinned when he put them into a plastic bag. Kai bites into his own made sandwich. Moaning as he enjoyed the taste of his chicken sandwich.

When he was done with his meal, checked he the time. 9am. Great. The guy in the hospital should be awaken now. He thought and placed his used things into the sink. Kai grabbed the bag and his Jacket. Then he left for the hospital. Luckily for him, it wasn't that far from the apartment. He could just walk to it, and move his body more around. Kai went off.

Jack woke up around 6am. Damn, he was tied to the bed when he opened his eyes. He struggled with the shackle. Both his wrist and ankle were tied to the bed. Jack grunted, hardly remembering what had happen before the stupid. Yes, in his eyes the doctor was stupid to stick what was it.. three syringes inside his arm. He still felt the pain from it. Jack looked down his arm and there where the doctor had injected him the sedative, there were a bruise.

He tried once more to free himself. But he had no luck. Eventually Jack gave up. He stopped fighting. His movements stilled and Jack took a deep breath. He realized just then that his chest hurt a little, his eyes burned and his mouth was dry. Damn, he need to use the toilet. "Hello?" Jack called out. "Oi, I need to take a piss. And I really don't want to do that in my pants." He yelled impatient, it rippling through his body as he started once again to struggle with the damn shackles.

His heart rate went higher and gave off another alarm. Soon after that burst into the room again a large amount of people. Jack sighed with a smirk on his face. "What took your guys so long. I need to piss, can someone free me from the damn shackles." Jack said meanwhile his heart beat slowed down, back to normal. He had notice yesterday that they will come when something was not okay with the damn heart watching machine. And he decided to have them come this way then. They freed him from the bed, and just one of the nurse stayed with him. Jack rubbed his wrist before he got up from the bed.

He looked around some, taking a careful look at the room. It's just a ordinary hospital room. Knowing that much let him relax a little. Then Jack went to the bathroom after the nurse freed him from the machine. He used his time inside the bathroom to splash some water on to his face, after taking his piss. Thinking he might woke up from this strange dream. But once again, he wasn't lucky. He sighed when he'd wiped his face dry. Jack gave his face a overlook, his scars was still there, his eye color hasn't changed, even his hair seemed normal. Jack put away the towel and went back into his room. The nurse had made his bed, and upon his nightstand stood a plate with food. His stomach grumbled in response of seeing the food there. Jack grimaced as he walked over to his bed. He did not felt any hungry. Jack roamed through the food, and after a while took the Apple there. He will eat this for now.. so his protesting belly will have to work on something and stay quiet.

Time seemed to have slowed down, it felt like hours that he sat there, but it was in fact just some minutes that had passed. Damn, he was tired of sitting around. His body needed to move. And so Jack is doing some simple twist crunches. He laid down on the ground his feet put under the bed. His arms placed behind his head. Then he rose his torso to the ceiling, moved his upper body to the left once his shoulders were off the ground, his left elbow touched his right knee, then back down and upward again, this time to the right, his right elbow touching his left knee, and finally his torso went back to the ground. He done at least one hundred of them. Jack did not even broke out into a sweat, as he did so. After that Jack went to do push ups.

Jack felt kind of lonely doing them in the room alone. He always had done them with either Zaeed or later as the Reapers attacked earth, he done this with the gang. James and Steven, Kai wasn't there anymore to do them with him together. They would do bets on who's going to outnumber the others first. Jack chuckles as he remembered the last time he had done this with them. It was also the first time he had beat James. He had done two more as him. Then he sighed and went on with his workout, Jack couldn't possible get lazy.

By the time Kai walked through the door, were Jack doing Handstand push ups, bare chested. With his back to the wall bend at the waist and he did placed both hands on the floor at shoulder width. He kicked himself up against the wall with his arms straight. His body is upside down with the arms and legs fully extended. Keeping his whole body as straight as possible. He slowly lowered himself to the ground as he inhale until his head almost touched the floor. He does it slow thus to avoid head injury. He pushed himself back up slowly as he did exhales until his elbows are nearly locked. He repeat his movements a few time, his body glitters with sweat he had build up in over two hours he is doing his workout.

His bare upper body is covered into scars that match them upon his face. He fought in many battles and they didn't heal after his body got rebuild by the Illusive Man. He was too stressed, and over the last two years and took the bad route in doing his missions with high risks. But Jack got them done nonetheless. Doctor Chakwas had told him, the way he's now, his scars won't heal. But Jack did not care. The scars have become a part of him and he likes them cause the visible scars match the once inside his heart, after the lose of his beloved one.

Jack didn't notice that Kai came inside the room, until his nervous coughing reached his ears. Jack stopped what he was doing and stood up. He flexed his muscles as he did watched Kai. "Good morning, Kai." Jack said with a smile, then he went to the bathroom and got a towel. With it he wiped away the well build sweat. "Good morning.." Kai said rubbing the nape of his neck as he tried his best not to stare at the guy bare chest. He could have sworn the guy did that on purpose, flexing his muscles just in all the right places. "I got you some sandwiches.. and uhm... what's your name btw?" Jack slung the towel around his neck, holding on to both ends. "I am Jack She... just Jack." He said sitting down on the bed. "Thanks for the sandwiches.." He said holding out his hand to receive the plastic bag from him.

Kai handed the small bag over to Jack and sat down on the empty chair there. "You are welcome? I... I've so many questions that I not even know where at I shall start.." Kai said his eyes focusing on a spot on the floor. Jack undoes the bag and takes out one of the sandwiches. "How.. how about you start with the easy questions first. I won't run away, never done so to begin with." Jack eyes watched Kai, he didn't liked the way his grace is focused upon the floor rather than on him. But there was no helping it. So Jack started to eat the sandwich in his hand.

Kai sat there on the stool, his hands folded together. "What were you doing on Virmire. There were a lot of soldiers, from us enemy there... uhm, you don't work for them, do you?" He asked his eyes glance at Jack as he spoke his last words. Kai watched Jack and waited for an answer.

Jack chews on the sandwich, his eyes locked with Kai's as he finally looked at him. Jack swallows down the bite he took. "I was there to save you. Did not know.. how I came to Virmire, my last visit there were years ago.. but.." Jack paused to take another bite. "But I'm glad I was there." Jack added his eyes looking down at his sandwich now. Talking over it, became hard. Jack does not know why... maybe he does. It's because.. he left once Kai to die. "And no, I do not work for Saren."

"How do you know that Saren is our enemy? Jack, you should not know anything about this." Kai said suddenly standing up. He walked towards him a few steps. "Besides.." He started taking in a deep breath. "Why would you want to save me. It makes no sense." Kai whispers in disbelief. He doubts the spoken words of Jack. No one send him, No one told him that they were there, No one know of him, it is almost like he never did exist... it confused Kai. He did sighed, searching for something inside the others eyes.

Jack sat on the bed, the sandwich forgotten in his hands. He thought about what to say next. He had to choice his words wisely. So Kai would believe him.. "I heard some Men.. soldier talk about him on Virmire.." Jack mumbled trying to sound sloppy. He then put the sandwich back into the plastic bag. "I saved you because... You did not deserved to die there, no one deserved to die like that." He said, his eyes did turned sad when he looked over to Kai.

Kai had watched him the whole time, he let Jack's words sink in to him. "It would make sense if you heard them talk.. but it does not explain why you were there. Dressed in a N7 gear. You're like a ghost that does not exist. Can you explain this? There's no file about you... not in the Alliance file system.. nor in any other systems. We checked that twice.." Kai said rubbing his temple to soothe the headache which poked at the back of his eyes. "True, but I had made up my mind. And I was ready to die." Kai said sighing softly. Then he walked around some more in the room, thinking.

Jack couldn't watch him continually walk around the room. It was driving him crazy. Jack stood up and grabbed hold of Kai's arms. Making the man stop with his walking. "Would you please stop and sit down. This is driving me crazy." He said sighing at the end of his spoken words. "I need my Omni-tool.. maybe it.. it would help you understand.." Jack said starring into Kai's eyes. He let go of both his arms, sliding his hands down Kai's. Damn, he missed doing this, feeling Kai's arms, his touch was light but it did not lingered there long enough so the other would feel awkward.

Kai's eyes widen in surprise and shock. He stopped walking the moment Jack got hold of his arms. He looked at him. Then dropped he his grace, stuttering a apologize. "I am sorry... I didn't mean to make you crazy.." Kai ears started to burn, he could feel the blush crawl up his cheeks. Kai needed a moment to understand Jack's next words. "Uhm.. your Omni-tool?" Kai blinked, and he had no idea that Jack had one. "Have you asked the doctor?" Kai asked with a frown on his face.

Jack turned away from Kai, the shocking face of his was too much to bear. "Well, you stopped now so don't apologize..." Jack muttered, walking back to the bed, Jack flopped down on the mattress. Places his hands behind his head as he spoke. "Yes, my Omni-tool. There is other stuff also that I want back.." Jack said his grace focused up at the ceiling. "I won't ask the stupid doctor. I've enough of them. If they don't let me out soon.. I will go berserk and force them.." Jack said half joking, his eyes looked serious but his lips with the small grin betrayed him when he did turned his head to look at Kai.

Kai still looked shocked as he starred at Jack. "Oh, okay." He said. Kai watched him flopping down on the bed, he was tempt to start walking around the room again. It after all helped him to think. "I.. I will ask the doctor.. but before I do so. I want you to eat some more.." Kai muttered picking up the plastic bag and let it drop up on Jack's bare chest. He should eat, he needs the energy. Not that his body starts to burn down more calories as he is getting into his body. "I can't promise you that you will get back your gear.. or any other stuff you had with your that day.." Kai said walking over to the window. He looked outside for a bit before his Omni-tool flicks to life, and he contacts the doctor.

"Okay... I will eat them." Jack mumbled and after a while had he finished his sandwiches, Kai urged him to eat them. He kind of pestered him. Jack hated it, but he was weak against Kai, he couldn't refuse him. The doctor came minutes later with a box in her hand into the room The doctor placed the box with Jack's things on the bed next to him. Jack immediately opened it. The box contained his Omni-tool, some dog tags, and his gear. His weapons were gone, just like he thought they would be put away from him.. Jack sighed, the first thing he picked out were his dog tags. He looked at them for one moment. His fingertips brush over the hardly visible names standing on them. He had his own tags put together with the ones which was belong to Kai. Jack put them around his neck. The weight of them made him feel better.. Then he picked out his Omni-tool, he slide it on. Jack started the tool. Realising once it flickered to life, that the energy was almost empty. "Damn." He muttered turning it off immediately. "I need to load it, the energy is low. It isn't enough to look through it. Useless piece of shit." Jack cursed and threw it back into the box.

Kai smiled while Jack ate the sandwiches, he was eating them as when he hasn't eaten anything good in a while. It's no wonder by the hospital food they serve here. When the doctor came stayed he mostly in the back of the room. Watching Jack and the way he handled the things inside the small box. He was surprised to see the dog tags. That meant Jack is a soldier. Trained to kill perhaps.. something sad was there about the way Jack fingertips traced over the dog tags. They looked surprisingly well kept. And that isn't usual. But he had to admit they looked good on him. Kai stepped closer to Jack, taking a closer look at the Omni-tool he had taken out from the box. It looked just like any other Omni-tool out there. "I will bring in something tomorrow, so you can load the thing." He said gently with a small smile.

Then Kai turned his attention to the doctor. "How long must he stay here?" he asked. He wasn't sure how long... and Admiral Hackett didn't put him into prison or anything so Kai came to wonder about this. The doctor needed still to run some test. She explained but Kai know better, the Admiral has the last say in this. They still don't know much about him. She whispers over to Kai, both had moved a bit aside. Jack gripped the tags which hung from his neck, seemingly lost in memories? Or was he thinking about something. Kai wasn't sure as he looked at him through his big eyelashes.


End file.
